Thursday

Ice Road Truckers

I love to watch ice road truckers! Do I want to become one on my drive home from Blackfoot... Certainly not! My drive home tonight was seriously the worst weather I have ever driven in and I was in the middle of freaking nowhere with wet hair and a dead battery on my cell phone. Thank you Heavenly Father for getting me (and Sanchez) home in one piece.

Wednesday

Best use of 5,000 dollars

So part of my job is to do job site inspections. I go out to a customers home and make sure that my installer is doing a great job and keeping the site clean etc. The other day I had to go to a clients home in Jackson Hole, WY. Before we could head back to Idaho Falls they closed the pass and the highway through Swan Valley.

So we ended up camped out in this million dollar home with nothing to do. So we looked through the catalogs on the coffee table. Holy Crap I could buy a car for what a pair of shoes cost in those catalogs!

 
(not original picture, but it's close enough)      
  This was my favorite item which Zac generously told me I could have. (I love him 18) How much do these babies cost you ask? 5,000+ dollars. In there defense the 80 pound model looks great in them. Maybe they'll do the same for me. All I can say is they better last like 100 years. They are smart you see because I'll be too fat for them long before I'll know if they last that long. I'm also not really sure in what situation these pants would be appropriate. Funeral, Nope. Church, Nope. The gym, Definitely not. Work, they'd die laughing. Lounging around the house, don't look comfy. Shopping, shopping where? Wearing them home to freak dad out, maybe.

Tuesday

White trash with money

Last night I was at dinner with friends. Somehow we got on the topic of Nebraska and someone started talking about my dad and his overall's and talking in a redneck accent. I said "yeah that's right can you see my dad, the department head of accounting and finance, teaching class in his overalls?" I said this because I saw the Nebraskan they saw in their mind and I knew that wasn't what my dad was.

Although I was thinking about it later... I may have been a little hasty. We have two, wait three cars, that don't run in the front yard. Oh and here's the best part of that... He is selling off parts of the truck to a neighbor a part at a time... A headlight here, a windshield there. Yeah that is classy.

Ok it gets better. Dad bought an old Honda motorcylce, it's a beast. So his ingenious idea is he'll park it in the basement of the house we are building. So he drives it in and parks it. The problem comes when he goes to drive it out as it is now in the middle of the family room of our completed home. Driving it in was no problem as the basement door was framed to fit a door and a sidelight. Now both are in place and, surprise the bike isn't fitting back out the door. I bet none of my friends can watch TV from the seat of their motorcycle.

So anyway, maybe they were closer to the truth than I'd like to admit. But you couldn't love your family anymore than I do. And any of my friends are welcome to stop by my white trash home anytime they are driving through on I-80. You'll know the exit, just look for Aunt Lou's truck stop just before Kearney.

Monday

Everything I need to know I learned from Lindsay Lyman

1. Music is good.
2. Music loud is better.
3. Inappropriate music blasting is the best.
4. "Money is just money."
5. Sometimes people just need to be made fun of.
6. It's nice to have a man around the house.
7. Forgiving yourself is important.
8. The important friendships withstand the hard times.
9. Say what you are thinking. You can't fix what you don't know about.
10. R is crazy, so is T.
11.Trashy is classy.
12. Best friend doesn't mean boyfriend.
13. It's ok to admit that you aren't good at something.
14. It's ok to admit that you are AWESOME at something.
15. Saturday is for sleeping in and cleaning.
16. Some friendships aren't worth the heartache they cause. It's ok to walk away.
17. Everyone needs a good nickname.
18. How to make the best chicken enchiladas.
19. Don't scoop poo rocks, Throw it all out and start again.
20. A good bra came make a world of difference.
21. It's not the price of the jewelry, it's the amount and how you wear it.
22. Sport your J-lo's with pride.
23. Diet coke and a maple bar make it all better.
24. Sometimes you just need to cry.
25. Adult acne is not a funny joke.

Lindsay is the only reason, I swear I made it though college. She made me laugh and she loved me, and more importantly I knew it. She listens to me whine and cry and well... I'm not the best friend back. She moved to SLC and I thought I would die, now she is moving to Seattle. Linds, I hope someday you decides what you want to be when you grow up. But for my sake I hope we never have to.

Sunday

Smurfette

I was at work early on Black Friday because while I have an office job I still work for a retail company and they needed all the help they could get. Well anyway half way through the morning one of my co-workers points out that my right arm is turning blue. I think oh wow they are right but I ignore it like I tend to do all semi serious health problems. It happened once before and it went away after a few hours.



Well a few hours go buy and my arm become so swollen that I can't really move it. I am still ignoring it but my boss sees it and freaks out and sends me home to go to the doctor. I see this as a great opportunity to have the day off and play with my family who are in town. Halfway home though I realize I am now loosing feeling in my arm. So I stop at the doctor's. They sent me straight to the hospital where they do an ultrasound on my arm. They don't find anything, but the hospital doctor tells me to take about a zillion doses of aspirin over the next week and one a day after that indefinably.

No one calls me for days then my doctor calls me and tells me that they need to do some more tests to find out what caused the clot I had and why my arm is turning blue as the clot was in an artery and my arm turning blue means there is a blockage in the vein.

Is it just me or should one of the 5 doctors who saw me that Friday been able to figure out that blue and swelling meant that the blood wasn't leaving my arm and maybe they should check the veins THEN. Oh and maybe someone could have told me I had a clot so I would have actually taken the aspirin prescribed me!

Ok so long story short. I have had two more ultrasounds and an echo cardiogram. All came back totally fine. I asked the doctor if he could pretend he didn't see my arm turn blue and could I just go home. He didn't laugh. I told him if I woke up from surgery a little skinnier in some areas and a little larger in others I would not be sad. Then he laughed and turned me over to a cardiologist for more tests.

Needless to say, I am not having anymore tests done, and I'm never going back to the hospital. So I am slowly turning into smurfette, big deal, and if I have a heart attack I'll spend Christmas with Mom instead of Dad.

Saturday

Why doesn't God want me to have a couch or cinnamon rolls?

I don't feel like that is too much to ask. So I go to make them and I don't have any yeast so I decide to run to Wal-Mart to grab some real fast. Side Note: I was hanging out around the house in my brothers old gym clothes, hot i know but they are SOO comfy and I kinda like that it makes him mad that I wear them. So back to the point, it's Idaho and late and I'll only be a second and let's be honest I'd probably still be the best dressed person there at this hour.

Since I literally only have like two dollars to my name i grabbed something to take back to Wal-mart. (I bet you didn't know they barter for yeast.) I pull up and run in and I fall flat on my face right there in the cross walk with like a million people watching me. So I get up all embarrassed, and head to customer service. I get there and the lady scans my item and says, "This isn't our product," and hands it back to me. So I pull out my receipt and hand it to her that says Wal-Mart of Ammon Idaho dated like three days ago and she says, "maa'm this isn't ours, you'll have to take it to the place you purchased it." It was only when I was walking away that I heard her say to the next person in line, "This isn't in my system it may not be from the store in Ammon but let me look, and since you have your receipt I can always give you a gift card." Grrr! Why do people think it's okay to be mean to me?

So I dig through my purse and find a dollar and twelve cents that rob had given me earlier in the day to get a diet coke cause I had gotten yelled at while I was at work by a customer and a manager, whom neither of had a real reason to. I decided that the 1.12 could be put to better use making me cinnamon rolls and grab a pack and check out.

I get out to my car and there is a couple with two little girls loading their groceries up in their truck right next to mine, and the two little girls are running everywhere. I get in thinking they'll hear my car start up and see the lights and the parents will move out of the way. No luck! I turn to make sure i can see both girls are out of the way and behind me is one of those guys who carries around a backpack of perfume all summer preying on people who are to nice to tell him to leave them alone and go away. Wouldn't you know this couple is one of them.

So they are sitting there, children still everywhere smelling all his perfume and right when I'm getting ready to say something they pull out money and I figure they are going to buy some, load up their groceries and be done. They pay and he leaves and they start loading up the groceries again. They finish the cart and I'm already for them to load up their girls so i can pull out when around the truck they pull another cart, so they are halfway done with that and they pull out their new perfume and start smelling it.

Up until know I kept saying just be patient, it's not hurting you, they'll move any second. But that was the last straw and I put my head on the steering wheel and just started crying. Then I thought just ask them to move, so I get out of my car all in tears and say "I'm so sorry guys but I really just want to go home." and then I really couldn't stop the tears. They thought I was crazy but they apologized and moved and grabbed their kids.

After I got home I told the story to Katy and she laughed at me and I cried again but was laughing too. Even during the situation I could see the humor in it I just couldn't stop the tears. I also texted my very best friends and one of them called and told me I was a silly girl and everything was all better.

Me and Katy made the cinnamon rolls and she was worried I had ruined them. she told me they looked like the cub scouts baked them, For some reason after that comment we couldn't stop laughing the rest of the night. For the record I am not going to Wal-Mart again for at least a month. I LOVE WinCo!!!! Oh P.S. The cinnamon rolls were awesome and they even looked really good, but I still need a couch!