Friday

Bank Boyfriend 2.0

I quit Wells Fargo bank years ago. I am almost certain Satan is the proprietor of that banking institution. However, my new fabulous company banks there and I have to take large checks in for deposit. WE build VERY nice homes and so I deposit VERY large checks semi frequently.

I was starting to be recognized when I went into the bank. Then one day I arrived at the counter and one of the managers was at the counter. He wanted to be all professional and call to verify every check I had over 25,000. I stood there forever thinking, "doesn't he know who I am?" I know, I'm that girl now. He wasn't very nice and I could tell you the entire story here, but my fingers are still taped together and typing is hard #firstworldproblems, I know.

Anyway, When I made it back to the office I told the boss men I didn't like how I was treated. A call was made and now every time I walk in they greet me by name and I get the royal treatment. There is one teller in particular who makes extra strides with me and we like to chat and laugh together. I may have developed a small crush on him.

So obviously I was trying to facebook stalk him. I tried finding him by looking up his branch. I was hoping that maybe someone with his first named would have liked the branch and then I'd be able to figure out who he was and stalk him.

I laughed out loud when I saw this. No one likes Wells Fargo, that seems about right.

I finally found him yesterday and Sam and I stalked him. He is perfect: LDS, likes the Institute at the U, Profile picture with his adorable mom, picture of him sailing. Guys he is probably the love of my life. UNTIL. I saw that he returned from his mission in 2012. He is a baby. So there go all my hopes and dreams.

Time to find a new bank boyfriend. I wonder if Chase has anyone for me?

Wednesday

Life is Good, and That Can Be Boring

Life is good.  Does anyone really want to read about that?

The other day I was so happy I caught myself singing along to a Rascal Flatts song. That is never ok. I was even drumming out the beat on my steering wheel. Sometimes life is so good you forget to hate things. 

Kayla and I have two new roommates. The mean ones are gone and have been replaced by nice girls. Raquel is so sweet and kind, and service oriented that you wonder if she is real life. Seriously. Sam is funny, and horribly inappropriate in all the right ways. She makes me laugh at things I shouldn't. It is amazing to come home to a non hostile environment. It has been over a year since I had that pleasure.

We come home and watch tv that will rot our brains while we quilt. Our craft room (we have a big one with two tvs) has made its way to the living room.  It is a hot mess and I love it. There are currently two sewing machines in there.

Speaking of quilting, the other day I was sitting in my office and my finger hurt. So I looked down and realized it was bleeding. Upon further inspection there was a mysterious deep cut. I can’t imagine where it came from other than possibly my rotary cutter, but why the delayed bleed? There was really no way to bandaid in between there, so we taped my fingers together so I would stop opening the wound. Turns out missing a finger is a minor annoyance. But my yoga instructor felt bad for me (she thought my finger was why I didn't attempt the crow pose) and massaged my back while I lay in child’s pose and everyone else attempted crow (crow is real hard, but I can do camel and no one else can)

Kyle A and I, along with Sam went to Craft Lake City this weekend where I bought the necklace AND earrings of my dreams. I wanted to buy a print of a cute little pirate in a ship but Kyle said it was for a nursery so I can’t have it if I don’t have babies. I kind of regret not buying it, but I found her etsy shop online and can buy it later (for twice as much). Why do I ever listen to Kyle?

I am addicted to breakfast nachos. Seriously. You put scrambled eggs, a little crumpled bacon, and a delicious cheese sauce over chips. A little salsa and you have yourself the most delicious heart attack of your life.  I want some right now, but I can’t. Too many breakfast nachos means Annie is on a diet.

I told you it would be boring. I can’t believe you read all the way through that.


One more thing. There is this boy who sits at a desk outside my office door. He does reception or something for the doctor of some kind of brain medicine in the office two down from mine. He is the opposite of pleasant and has the dorkiest haircut. Did I just type that out loud? I’ll repent tonight. Anyway I heard someone mention to him that it was his last day. I of course was doing a secret dance of joy in my office. Then I overheard that it is his last day because he is getting married this weekend. Do you ever hear that kind of news and think to yourself “who is marrying Mr. Grumps  A Lot?” He doesn’t even compensate for his horrid personality with nice hair! 

Monday

Let Them Eat Cake

I googled it. Turns out you can get one at a Smith’s in Fort Union. 

The only place in Utah, and I was hanging out with a friend just a short jog away. We ran over and bought one as a surprise for Kayla. But I felt like we needed a reason to have such a rich and wonderful cake, so I texted many of you asking for an idea to write on the cake.

Your responses follow:
  • Let’s Celebrate that I am home now.
  • 40 days without killing a co-worker.
  • 4 days until the weekend.
  • You only gained 2  pounds this week.
  • Happy three day weekend.
  • Because you aren't on peopleofwalmart.com.
  • You can still walk up the stairs w/o being short of breath.
  • It’s not ding-dongs.
  • Survived Monday.
  • Spring has sprung.
  • I’m a lovely person.
  • Happy cake day.
  • Let them eat cake
My ideas were:
  • Diet starts Monday.
  • Lay off me I’m Starving.
  • #eatsomething
P.S. If you didn't get a text don't be sad. I just texted the last few people who had texted me. I have a brand new phone so that is a short list. So Moral of the story, text me.... and eat cake. 

Wednesday

New Phone

I showed my smashed phone to my boss.
"We'll get you a new one."

Ummm.... I'm thinking like a flip phone.

"Go down to Verizon on your lunch and pick out a phone, I don't care what it is. Keep it under $1,000."

*At the Verizon Store*

Me: Tell me why I would want an iphone?

Verizon Guy: Well if you want to be cool like your friends.

*******

Me: What is the difference between the Samsung S5 and S4?

VG: Well the S5 has some really cool fitness features.

Me: Do I  LOOK like I am into fitness?

VG: Well.... Maybe you want to start.... this would make it easy.

Me: Does it show me how to find the best egg roll in town?

********

Me: I don't like any of these cases you brought out. They are all icky, got any cute ones?

VG: Define cute?

Me: Like maybe they have a fireman on the back... or a picture of Luke Bryan!

VG: Well what I could do is get out my paint set and we could see what we could whip up for you.

*******

But seriously guys. I got a brand new S5 yesterday because I work for the best guys in the world. That was no waste of money. He just bought himself one darn loyal employee. Everyone wants to work here.


Tuesday

Wade is Home

Wade has been working on a cruise ship since November. Thus he has been mostly unreachable. This from the guy who would call me from the beach in Hawaii on vacation just to talk. But he's back now and has been trying to call me. But with no working phone I had no idea.

Today I got this message from a mutual friend via Google chat:

Wade wanted me to tell you the following:
  • He thinks you're really pretty
  • his dog faked a pregnancy again (he hates it when she does that)
  • he thought of you on mothers day
  • that he was so busy helping his dad with his mothers day gifts that he forgot to get his mom anything
  • he bought a new cologne, it smells good and he can't wait to wear it all the days.
  • He has something for you from Japan
  • and thank you god bless!

I can't wait until my phone is working again so I can get all the scoop and the gossip on his travels. I just love that kid! 

Sunday

I Do What I Want

Remember the two fancy events I went to here.

Well two nights ago Kyle A and myself found ourselves at another event.

Kyle: "Uh I think those are your favorite cookies on that table."

Me: "Huh?"

Kyle: "Those cookies you love I think they have them on that table."

ME: "Ruby Snaps?! Where?!" as I shove my dinner leftovers in to his hands

Kyle: "You can only have one!" he calls out to me as I run across the room like a crazy girl

Me: "I'll do what I want! AND THEY ARE THE GOOD ONES!!!!"

Kyle: "Seriously you only get one."

Me: "and the one you aren't eating, wait.... These aren't Ruby Snaps!"

*10 minutes later*

Me: "Is it ok to throw half a cookie away in front of a homeless man? Part of me feels that it's wrong, but would it be insulting to offer him a half eaten cookie?"

Saturday

No Phone Either

Well I now also have no phone.

You see I was cleaning the basement,

and listening to the beach boys on my phone.

I had it in the pocket of my hoodie,

and I was MAYBE dancing.

My phone fell out and landed on the tile floor.

I picked it up and went back to dancing.

Then it fell out again.

I mean maybe I was dancing....

The second time I picked it up I noticed that the screen was shattered.

Not cracked, SHATTERED!!!

But still playing Good Vibrations!

My phone has it's priorities.